The Agony & Irony of Your Favorite Band Becoming Mediocre a.k.a. Learning to Lower Expectations

Let's hop in our delorians, crank it up to 88mph, and go back into time just for a second. It was 2000. Alkaline Trio had just released Maybe I'll Catch Fire and Alkaline Trio on Asian Man Records. They were clearly one of the best underground bands around. It was a time when, as the rumor goes, you could still get into Alkaline Trio shows for free if you had an Alkaline Trio tattoo. It was then, at the ripe age of 21, that I got the Alkaline Trio heart and skull tattooed on my arm. There was no blood pact. They weren't being played on corporate radio. And every little emo kid didn't have it tattooed on their body (although they are easy to pick up when they find out I have one haha).

Now fast forward to next week. July 1, 2008. Open your cd player, put in the new Alkaline Trio record Agony & Irony.

If this is your first time hearing Alkaline Trio, you are probably pretty stoked. The driving intricately layered guitars leave you smiling. The intelligent and darkly cliched lyrics make the corner of your mouth snarl up into a grin for a second.

From the fast, almost ska-like cadence of "In Vein" to the slow ballad of "Live Young, Die Fast" and beyond, Alkaline Trio shows maturity from their older work. They have grown as musicians, lyricists, and image conscious individuals. No longer do they simply rely upon skulls and blood, but instead craft such images into stories of relationships and gloom. It is the same old story, just from someone who has learned to use an expanded vocabulary to create the story of doom.

For the die hard Alkaline Trio fan, someone who has been there from almost the beginning, the album is a bit too overproduced. When I listen to it, there are moments that I feel bored. There are moments where I feel the tracks are too polished and I long for the raw tales of crying in beer. That being said, I have only listened to the record once, and in it I can still hear some excellent songs that although they are not my favorite Alkaline Trio tracks, I can already tell they will grow on me.

As a huge Matt Skiba fan, I have to say that on Agony it is the Dan tracks that shine. From the first time I heard "In Vein," when the band released it on their myspace for 24 hours, I knew I loved the song. There are moments when the song dags on a little too long, but as a whole I think it is a great upbeat track. Oddly enough, although I find the Dan tracks to carry the record, but favorite track has to be "Into the Night," with Skiba crooning "So sing to me your darkest secrets/Time to leave behind your regrets/Before we get lost in the blink of an eye." This track is more of the traditional Alkaline Trio formula (harkening back to a time when you knew a song was the Trio as soon as you heard the opening notes strummed on Matt's guitar).

If this was my first exposure to the band, I would probably rave on and on about the record...but because I am stuck in the box of wanting the past Trio songs to be recreated in some new form, I can't help but be let down. This is no Goddamnit. There is no "Mr. Chainsaw" or "Radio." But, I do think that after a few listens I will consider it to be a strong record. It is an improvement upon the two or three tracks on Crimson that I enjoyed (although I feel as if those few tracks on liked on that record are pretty great). And as major label releases go these days, I do think it tops most of the other stuff out there.

In the end I am torn...do I want to like this record because it is Alkaline Trio? Or
is it actually growing on me the more I think about it? Will it be like Against Me's major label debut that I absolutely hated at first, but which I now tolerate on some occasions, yet enjoy on most occasions? I think it is probably the latter. I hope it is. I'll give it another two or eight spins and update further.

Wanted: Assassin Flick Takes Action to a New Level

On June 27, the long awaited film "Wanted" comes out in the theaters. I was lucky enough to see a sneak preview of the first english-language film from Russian director Timur Bekmambetov this past Wednesday, and I have to say, if you are somewhat into action flicks, it is certainly worth checking out!

Starring Angelina Jolie, James McAvoy, and Morgan Freeman, it is the story of Wesley Gibson (played by McAvoy), a 25-year-old self-proclaimed nobody who works in a cubicle, has a girlfriend who cheats on him with his supposed best friend, and whose father walked out on him when he was just a baby. In short, he thinks he is a loser and refuses to do anything about. Then one day Fox (played by Jolie) comes walking into his life and says she knows his father and that he was in fact an assassin. Fox recruits Wesley into The Fraternity, a secret assassins society, who seeks to train Welsey into the assassin he was born to be. From there, all hell breaks lose and McAvoy is transformed from a loser into a trained killer, seeking revenge upon the assassin who killed his father only days earlier.


Morgan Freeman plays the stoic character that you probably have come to expect from him. He is Sloan, the head of the assassins order that ensures order in the world. Sloan, however, is somehwat of a badass and has some Samuel Jackson-esque one liners that had me laughing with glee.

Angelina Jolie plays Fox as a cold hearted assassin, who is Sloan's right hand (wo)man and trains Wesley into a killer. She has an affection for Wesley, but does not let that get in the way of the code by which she lives...the Fraternity assassinates the names they are given because the death of one could save the lives of thousands.

The film is full of twists and tons of action, but for those that are squeamish, there is a ton of blood. It takes American action film to new levels...in the same way that Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon took martial arts films to a new level (thanks Pope!). For that reason I say that if you are into action films, go out and see it...you will not be disappointed.

Alkaline Trio to Release Nike Shoes

So Alkaline Trio has announced that on June 27th (good date!) they will be releasing their new Nike Heart and Sole Air Zoom shoes. At first, although I thought nike and the trio were a weird pairing, but I thought I would give them the benefit of the doubt...afterall they demanded that the shoes be vegan since they are vegetarians! However, once i saw the shoe, I was let down. Here is the video that they are using to promote including Matt Skiba talking about the shoe:


In the video Skiba says..."Dude, I can't believe this [the alkaline trio logo] and this [the nike swoosh] are on the same thing...It's like the best...It like makes my life." I can't tell if he is being serious or not. Being a successful musician where you can live off the money and be on a major label is okay...but being on a nike shoe means you can die happy?! Is he really hurting for money so bad they had to do this? Did the label push them into it? He's always been nice to me, and is best friends with Mike, so I will still give him the benefit of the doubt, but it just seems a little bit too much for me...I mean, I guess if i thought the shoe looked awesome i wouldn't care as much, but the original Londons that Macbeth release (both the suede which i rocked forever, and the full grain which came later) that had Trio lyrics in them were SO MUCH BETTER!!
You decide:


vs.


(I wish I could find a pic of the suede ones...they are so much better.

I don't know...maybe they will grow on me. In the video they look thinner and more sleek. Maybe the picture they are using to promote it is just bad.

But I am still shocked...a pairing of Alkaline Trio and Nike? What's next...Against Me! and a major label? oh wait...!!!

THIS JUST IN: SCOTUS preserves Habeas Corpus...Scalia is still a Dick!

In a 5-4 ruling today, SCOTUS said that in the case of Boumediene v. Bush that Habeas Corpus applied to detainees at GITMO. Although this does not expand their rights at all, it prevents the final death knell in what is one of our most important rights and what ensures we stay a democracy.

From Wikipedia:

Habeas Corpus is the name of a legal action, or writ, through which a person can seek relief from unlawful detention of themselves or another person. The writ of habeas corpus has historically been an important instrument for the safeguarding of individual freedom against arbitrary state action.

It was an amazing rebuke not only to the President, but to the Congress, and is something we don't see too often...the Supreme Court actually ruling the right way has been sparse recently. And, of course, the 4 dissenting judges were the quartet of the most dangerous men in America: Roberts, Scalia, Thomas, and Alito. Those 4 men have done more to set back civil rights than any other in Americas.


A few of the highlights from the 70+ page majority decision eloquently written by Justice Anthony Kennedy:

Security depends upon a sophisticated intelligence apparatus and the ability of our Armed Forces to act and to interdict. There are further considerations, however. Security subsists, too, in fidelity to freedom’s first principles. Chief among these are freedom from arbitrary and unlawful restraint and the personal liberty that is secured by adherence to the separation of powers. It is from these principles that the judicial authority to consider petitions for habeas corpus relief derives.

Within the Constitution’s separation-of-powers structure, few exercises of judicial power are as legitimate or as necessary as the responsibility to hear challenges to the authority of the Executive to imprison a person.

and

The laws and Constitution are designed to survive, and remain in force, in extraordinary times. Liberty and security can be reconciled; and in our system they are reconciled within the framework of the law. The Framers decided that habeas corpus, a right of first importance, must be a part of that framework, a part of that law.

And from Souter's concurrence:

After six years of sustained executive detentions in Guantanamo, subject to habeas jurisdiction but without any actual habeas scrutiny, today’s decision is no judicial victory, but an act of perseverance in trying to make habeas review, and the obligation of the courts to provide it, mean something of value both to prisoners and to the Nation.

On another note, Justice Antonin Scalia showed his true colors in this decision...Scalia's dissent is worth reading, even for you all that are not nerds like me, for such statements as "it will almost certainly cause more Americans to be killed." Unbelievable.

Some of the other highlights from one of the worst opinions Scalia has written (generally, even when I disagree with him, which is 99.5% of the time, he at least comes off as intelligent...here he does not):

America is at war with radical Islamists. The enemy began by killing Americans and American allies abroad...

and

The Nation will live to regret what the Court has done today.

We have been living to regret Scalia opinions since he took his seat on the court in 1986. Thank god this is one we will not!

The 2008 Grendel Birthday Bash

Come one, come all to the Grendel Birthday Bash featuring Clamhammer, Fresh Espresso (a.k.a. P Smoov & Rik Rude), and Martyrs of the Apollo Guild.

Obama Clinches Nomination!

Quite an historic day...Makes me proud to be an American for a change.



Update: Here is the speech he will deliver tonight!

Tonight, after fifty-four hard-fought contests, our primary season has finally come to an end.

Sixteen months have passed since we first stood together on the steps of the Old State Capitol in Springfield, Illinois. Thousands of miles have been traveled. Millions of voices have been heard. And because of what you said - because you decided that change must come to Washington; because you believed that this year must be different than all the rest; because you chose to listen not to your doubts or your fears but to your greatest hopes and highest aspirations, tonight we mark the end of one historic journey with the beginning of another - a journey that will bring a new and better day to America. Tonight, I can stand before you and say that I will be the Democratic nominee for President of the United States.

I want to thank every American who stood with us over the course of this campaign - through the good days and the bad; from the snows of Cedar Rapids to the sunshine of Sioux Falls. And tonight I also want to thank the men and woman who took this journey with me as fellow candidates for President.

At this defining moment for our nation, we should be proud that our party put forth one of the most talented, qualified field of individuals ever to run for this office. I have not just competed with them as rivals, I have learned from them as friends, as public servants, and as patriots who love America and are willing to work tirelessly to make this country better. They are leaders of this party, and leaders that America will turn to for years to come.

That is particularly true for the candidate who has traveled further on this journey than anyone else. Senator Hillary Clinton has made history in this campaign not just because she's a woman who has done what no woman has done before, but because she's a leader who inspires millions of Americans with her strength, her courage, and her commitment to the causes that brought us here tonight.

We've certainly had our differences over the last sixteen months. But as someone who's shared a stage with her many times, I can tell you that what gets Hillary Clinton up in the morning - even in the face of tough odds - is exactly what sent her and Bill Clinton to sign up for their first campaign in Texas all those years ago; what sent her to work at the Children's Defense Fund and made her fight for health care as First Lady; what led her to the United States Senate and fueled her barrier-breaking campaign for the presidency - an unyielding desire to improve the lives of ordinary Americans, no matter how difficult the fight may be. And you can rest assured that when we finally win the battle for universal health care in this country, she will be central to that victory. When we transform our energy policy and lift our children out of poverty, it will be because she worked to help make it happen. Our party and our country are better off because of her, and I am a better candidate for having had the honor to compete with Hillary Rodham Clinton.

There are those who say that this primary has somehow left us weaker and more divided. Well I say that because of this primary, there are millions of Americans who have cast their ballot for the very first time. There are Independents and Republicans who understand that this election isn't just about the party in charge of Washington, it's about the need to change Washington. There are young people, and African-Americans, and Latinos, and women of all ages who have voted in numbers that have broken records and inspired a nation.

All of you chose to support a candidate you believe in deeply. But at the end of the day, we aren't the reason you came out and waited in lines that stretched block after block to make your voice heard. You didn't do that because of me or Senator Clinton or anyone else. You did it because you know in your hearts that at this moment - a moment that will define a generation - we cannot afford to keep doing what we've been doing. We owe our children a better future. We owe our country a better future. And for all those who dream of that future tonight, I say - let us begin the work together. Let us unite in common effort to chart a new course for America.

In just a few short months, the Republican Party will arrive in St. Paul with a very different agenda. They will come here to nominate John McCain, a man who has served this country heroically. I honor that service, and I respect his many accomplishments, even if he chooses to deny mine. My differences with him are not personal; they are with the policies he has proposed in this campaign.

Because while John McCain can legitimately tout moments of independence from his party in the past, such independence has not been the hallmark of his presidential campaign.

It's not change when John McCain decided to stand with George Bush ninety-five percent of the time, as he did in the Senate last year.

It's not change when he offers four more years of Bush economic policies that have failed to create well-paying jobs, or insure our workers, or help Americans afford the skyrocketing cost of college - policies that have lowered the real incomes of the average American family, widened the gap between Wall Street and Main Street, and left our children with a mountain of debt.

And it's not change when he promises to continue a policy in Iraq that asks everything of our brave men and women in uniform and nothing of Iraqi politicians - a policy where all we look for are reasons to stay in Iraq, while we spend billions of dollars a month on a war that isn't making the American people any safer.

So I'll say this - there are many words to describe John McCain's attempt to pass off his embrace of George Bush's policies as bipartisan and new. But change is not one of them.

Change is a foreign policy that doesn't begin and end with a war that should've never been authorized and never been waged. I won't stand here and pretend that there are many good options left in Iraq, but what's not an option is leaving our troops in that country for the next hundred years - especially at a time when our military is overstretched, our nation is isolated, and nearly every other threat to America is being ignored.

We must be as careful getting out of Iraq as we were careless getting in - but start leaving we must. It's time for Iraqis to take responsibility for their future. It's time to rebuild our military and give our veterans the care they need and the benefits they deserve when they come home. It's time to refocus our efforts on al Qaeda's leadership and Afghanistan, and rally the world against the common threats of the 21st century - terrorism and nuclear weapons; climate change and poverty; genocide and disease. That's what change is.

Change is realizing that meeting today's threats requires not just our firepower, but the power of our diplomacy - tough, direct diplomacy where the President of the United States isn't afraid to let any petty dictator know where America stands and what we stand for. We must once again have the courage and conviction to lead the free world. That is the legacy of Roosevelt, and Truman, and Kennedy. That's what the American people want. That's what change is.

Change is building an economy that rewards not just wealth, but the work and workers who created it. It's understanding that the struggles facing working families can't be solved by spending billions of dollars on more tax breaks for big corporations and wealthy CEOs, but by giving a the middle-class a tax break, and investing in our crumbling infrastructure, and transforming how we use energy, and improving our schools, and renewing our commitment to science and innovation. It's understanding that fiscal responsibility and shared prosperity can go hand-in-hand, as they did when Bill Clinton was President.

John McCain has spent a lot of time talking about trips to Iraq in the last few weeks, but maybe if he spent some time taking trips to the cities and towns that have been hardest hit by this economy - cities in Michigan, and Ohio, and right here in Minnesota - he'd understand the kind of change that people are looking for.

Maybe if he went to Iowa and met the student who works the night shift after a full day of class and still can't pay the medical bills for a sister who's ill, he'd understand that she can't afford four more years of a health care plan that only takes care of the healthy and wealthy. She needs us to pass health care plan that guarantees insurance to every American who wants it and brings down premiums for every family who needs it. That's the change we need.

Maybe if he went to Pennsylvania and met the man who lost his job but can't even afford the gas to drive around and look for a new one, he'd understand that we can't afford four more years of our addiction to oil from dictators. That man needs us to pass an energy policy that works with automakers to raise fuel standards, and makes corporations pay for their pollution, and oil companies invest their record profits in a clean energy future - an energy policy that will create millions of new jobs that pay well and can't be outsourced. That's the change we need.

And maybe if he spent some time in the schools of South Carolina or St. Paul or where he spoke tonight in New Orleans, he'd understand that we can't afford to leave the money behind for No Child Left Behind; that we owe it to our children to invest in early childhood education; to recruit an army of new teachers and give them better pay and more support; to finally decide that in this global economy, the chance to get a college education should not be a privilege for the wealthy few, but the birthright of every American. That's the change we need in America. That's why I'm running for President.

The other side will come here in September and offer a very different set of policies and positions, and that is a debate I look forward to. It is a debate the American people deserve. But what you don't deserve is another election that's governed by fear, and innuendo, and division. What you won't hear from this campaign or this party is the kind of politics that uses religion as a wedge, and patriotism as a bludgeon - that sees our opponents not as competitors to challenge, but enemies to demonize. Because we may call ourselves Democrats and Republicans, but we are Americans first. We are always Americans first.

Despite what the good Senator from Arizona said tonight, I have seen people of differing views and opinions find common cause many times during my two decades in public life, and I have brought many together myself. I've walked arm-in-arm with community leaders on the South Side of Chicago and watched tensions fade as black, white, and Latino fought together for good jobs and good schools. I've sat across the table from law enforcement and civil rights advocates to reform a criminal justice system that sent thirteen innocent people to death row. And I've worked with friends in the other party to provide more children with health insurance and more working families with a tax break; to curb the spread of nuclear weapons and ensure that the American people know where their tax dollars are being spent; and to reduce the influence of lobbyists who have all too often set the agenda in Washington.

In our country, I have found that this cooperation happens not because we agree on everything, but because behind all the labels and false divisions and categories that define us; beyond all the petty bickering and point-scoring in Washington, Americans are a decent, generous, compassionate people, united by common challenges and common hopes. And every so often, there are moments which call on that fundamental goodness to make this country great again.

So it was for that band of patriots who declared in a Philadelphia hall the formation of a more perfect union; and for all those who gave on the fields of Gettysburg and Antietam their last full measure of devotion to save that same union.

So it was for the Greatest Generation that conquered fear itself, and liberated a continent from tyranny, and made this country home to untold opportunity and prosperity.

So it was for the workers who stood out on the picket lines; the women who shattered glass ceilings; the children who braved a Selma bridge for freedom's cause.

So it has been for every generation that faced down the greatest challenges and the most improbable odds to leave their children a world that's better, and kinder, and more just.

And so it must be for us.

America, this is our moment. This is our time. Our time to turn the page on the policies of the past. Our time to bring new energy and new ideas to the challenges we face. Our time to offer a new direction for the country we love.

The journey will be difficult. The road will be long. I face this challenge with profound humility, and knowledge of my own limitations. But I also face it with limitless faith in the capacity of the American people. Because if we are willing to work for it, and fight for it, and believe in it, then I am absolutely certain that generations from now, we will be able to look back and tell our children that this was the moment when we began to provide care for the sick and good jobs to the jobless; this was the moment when the rise of the oceans began to slow and our planet began to heal; this was the moment when we ended a war and secured our nation and restored our image as the last, best hope on Earth. This was the moment - this was the time - when we came together to remake this great nation so that it may always reflect our very best selves, and our highest ideals. Thank you, God Bless you, and may God Bless the United States of America.

Keith Olbermann, the End of the Nomination Process, and Fuck the South

So, for those of you who do not follow Keith Olbermann since his ESPN days, he has always been a pretty awesome pundit, whether it is sports or politics. Here is something from his ESPN days...


He has a segment on his current political show on MSNBC where he makes a "special comment" on different situations. The most intense one I have seen yet came on Hillary's assassination remarks. Her remarks really bothered me because it is entirely possible that the Clintons are not above inciting racial hatred to have Obama eliminated and have her take office. They have shown who they truly are over the last few months. At worst, her comments were extremely irresponsible. Here is what Olbermann had to say:

I think his outrage sums it up perfectly. I have come to respect Keith Olbermann so much more over the last few years and I am glad he is sdoing what he does!

On another nother, looks like tonight is the end for Hillary Clinton. SHe is now maneuvering for VP. Let's hope this doesn't happen. I don't think I can vote for Obama if she is on the ticket. Might as well just pick Cheney to be his VP.

And finally, i wanted to remind everyone of this blog that was posted at fuckthesouth.com the day after the last Presidential election. I didn't write it (I probably would have worded it much differently), but much of what it says has resonated with me.

November 3, 2004

Fuck the South. Fuck 'em. We should have let them go when they wanted to leave. But no, we had to kill half a million people so they'd stay part of our special Union. Fighting for the right to keep slaves - yeah, those are states we want to keep.

And now what do we get? We're the fucking Arrogant Northeast Liberal Elite? How about this for arrogant: the South is the Real America? The Authentic America. Really?

Cause we fucking founded this country, assholes. Those Founding Fathers you keep going on and on about? All that bullshit about what you think they meant by the Second Amendment giving you the right to keep your assault weapons in the glove compartment because you didn't bother to read the first half of the fucking sentence? Who do you think those wig-wearing lacy-shirt sporting revolutionaries were? They were fucking blue-staters, dickhead. Boston? Philadelphia? New York? Hello? Think there might be a reason all the fucking monuments are up here in our backyard?

No, No. Get the fuck out. We're not letting you visit the Liberty Bell and fucking Plymouth Rock anymore until you get over your real American selves and start respecting those other nine amendments. Who do you think those fucking stripes on the flag are for? Nine are for fucking blue states. And it would be 10 if those Vermonters had gotten their fucking Subarus together and broken off from New York a little earlier. Get it? We started this shit, so don't get all uppity about how real you are you Johnny-come-lately "Oooooh I've been a state for almost a hundred years" dickheads. Fuck off.

Arrogant? You wanna talk about us Northeasterners being fucking arrogant? What's more American than arrogance? Hmmm? Maybe horsies? I don't think so. Arrogance is the fucking cornerstone of what it means to be American. And I wouldn't be so fucking arrogant if I wasn't paying for your fucking bridges, bitch.

All those Federal taxes you love to hate? It all comes from us and goes to you, so shut up and enjoy your fucking Tennessee Valley Authority electricity and your fancy highways that we paid for. And the next time Florida gets hit by a hurricane you can come crying to us if you want to, but you're the ones who built on a fucking swamp. "Let the Spanish keep it, it’s a shithole," we said, but you had to have your fucking orange juice.

The next dickwad who says, "It’s your money, not the government's money" is gonna get their ass kicked. Nine of the ten states that get the most federal fucking dollars and pay the least... can you guess? Go on, guess. That’s right, motherfucker, they're red states. And eight of the ten states that receive the least and pay the most? It’s too easy, asshole, they’re blue states. It’s not your money, assholes, it’s fucking our money. What was that Real American Value you were spouting a minute ago? Self reliance? Try this for self reliance: buy your own fucking stop signs, assholes.

Let’s talk about those values for a fucking minute. You and your Southern values can bite my ass because the blue states got the values over you fucking Real Americans every day of the goddamn week. Which state do you think has the lowest divorce rate you marriage-hyping dickwads? Well? Can you guess? It’s fucking Massachusetts, the fucking center of the gay marriage universe. Yes, that’s right, the state you love to tie around the neck of anyone to the left of Strom Thurmond has the lowest divorce rate in the fucking nation. Think that’s just some aberration? How about this: 9 of the 10 lowest divorce rates are fucking blue states, asshole, and most are in the Northeast, where our values suck so bad. And where are the highest divorce rates? Care to fucking guess? 10 of the top 10 are fucking red-ass we're-so-fucking-moral states. And while Nevada is the worst, the Bible Belt is doing its fucking part.

But two guys making out is going to fucking ruin marriage for you? Yeah? Seems like you're ruining it pretty well on your own, you little bastards. Oh, but that's ok because you go to church, right? I mean you do, right? Cause we fucking get to hear about it every goddamn year at election time. Yes, we're fascinated by how you get up every Sunday morning and sing, and then you're fucking towers of moral superiority. Yeah, that's a workable formula. Maybe us fucking Northerners don't talk about religion as much as you because we're not so busy sinning, hmmm? Ever think of that, you self-righteous assholes? No, you're too busy erecting giant stone tablets of the Ten Commandments in buildings paid for by the fucking Northeast Liberal Elite. And who has the highest murder rates in the nation? It ain't us up here in the North, assholes.

Well this gravy train is fucking over. Take your liberal-bashing, federal-tax-leaching, confederate-flag-waving, holier-than-thou, hypocritical bullshit and shove it up your ass.

And no, you can't have your fucking convention in New York next time. Fuck off.